Do you believe in global warming?

Not one of my kids, nor my wife, has ever asked me the following question: "Do you believe in global warming?"  My son is 16 now, and I don't think he would ever ask me this question because he's a smart kid and can see the answer for himself.  But, hypothetically speaking, let's assume for the sake of this post that he did ask me this question.

Son:  "Dad, do you believe in global warming?"

Dad:  "That's a misleading question."

Son:  "What do you mean?"

Dad:  "Let me rephrase your question for you.  Dad, do you believe in man made global warming?"

Son: "Okay!  Do you believe in man made global warming?"

Dad:  "Facts matter. Here are the facts: If you look to the satellite data in the last 18 years, there's been zero recorded warming."

Son: "So, you're saying global warming isn't real!"

Dad:  "I'm saying the data and facts don't support it."

Son:  "What do you mean?"

Dad:  "Look, there is always going to be global warming and cooling. Nothing is statistic. That's not the argument. The argument is whether or not modern civilization, such as is experienced in most Western Nations like the United States and Europe, is responsible for it.  Is America responsible for climate change? That is the absurdity of it.

Son: (listening intently)

Dad:  "Think of it this way. The climate is so complex that it is beyond the mortal mind to understand it. Just like our minds cannot fathom creation beyond the Big Bang Theory, the human mind cannot explain climate. We can study it, we can research it, we can release whatever we think we've learned, but we can't conclusively say anything factual about the weather, let alone the climate."

Son: "But the media says there is a consensus that global warming is real.  They say it's a consensus among scientists."  

Dad:  "Where there's a consensus there's no science.  Science is not up to a vote. If science were up to a vote, it would be very easy for Obama to buy the favor of scientists with grants, which he is doing by the way. Science cannot be bought.  Science cannot be voted on.  

Son:  "But, Dad, they teach this in school as thought it were a fact."

Dad:  "And when you doubt them they probably look at you and say, 'Jordan, you're not saying that global warming isn't real?'  

Son:  "That's exactly what happens." 

Dad:  "This just goes to show how much smarter you are than they are.  They have been hoodwinked.  It depresses me, but it's true.  It amazes me how many smart, educated people have fallen for the global warming hoax.  

Son: "So you think it's a hoax?"

Dad:  "I think there are people so indebted to the idea that mankind is causing global warming, they have so much invested into it, that they can't get out of it.  During the 1970s they were so concerned about global cooling they wanted to melt the polar caps.  Aren't you glad they didn't succeed."

Son: "Uh huh."

Dad:  "Then the temperatures started to rise, and during the 1990s they changed to global warming.  Then in 1998 global temperatures stopped going up.  Son, there hasn't been an increase in global temperatures since, I think, 1998.  So now they call it climate change.  They just don't give up.  You want to know why they don't give up?

Son: "Why?"

Dad:  "Because global cooling, or warming, or climate change, or whatever they choose to call it tomorrow, is nothing more than an excuse for them to push forth their high regulation and high tax agenda.  That's all it is."

Son: (Smiling)  "I'm impressed."